My mind at ease

Well, it was time to clean up this thing that i created many moons ago. I started this blog to simply keep an intangible journal. Something i couldn't lose and could go to from time to time. I never thought people would actually read this, nor comment. Thus, the clean up. Over the past few years i have loved, lost, grown, cried, smiled, raged, learned and lived. Life is a journey that must be taken one day at a time. Curve balls have been thrown my way but with such luck i have learned to finally hit the ball. No, i am not a good writer, nor think i am. I am not a poet. I am not an artist. I never plan to be but, i do believe that writing can ease the mind. I have learned to live and let live. There is a line in one of my favorite songs from Senses Fail "I know I got a tattoo for a reason, why cant I just hold it true?" Seems simple, but in the past I have let myself down. Upon my right wrist I placed a nautical compass- Let bygones be bygones, look forward and never look back. Upon my left wrist the chemical compound for dopamine- Always find happiness. These are carefully placed in places I can see them daily for the simple reminder, always move forward and don't look back, find happiness in anything and everything. Upon my right ribs- A tree, a spectrum of spring, summer, autumn and winter all in one for the circle of life. Someone once told me "Life is nothing short of beautiful." It originated from a poem "This night is nothing short of beautiful." This is my representation of just that- Cette vie ne rien que belle. Life is good and bad, it depends on how you look at it. "We started from the bottom, Now we're here." This is how i feel as of late. I have destroyed and recreated my life. I live to be a great father to my children. I have been very successful in my line of work and the sky is the limit with my knowledge and my desire to continue to be greater than yesterday. I have found a healthy lifestyle which has helped me get out of a negative bubble that I was sucked into not too long ago. I have become very fond of bodybuilding, which has helped me kick some bad habits. I have learned to meditate, something similar to praying for those religious folk. I have learned to forgive and let go of many feelings and events that have occurred in my past. Music is still a big part of my life, but what I listen to now is very different than before. As silly as it sounds i have become very good at star craft 2, and i have used this to help me recover. I have gained a great family over the past year and am getting married this summer to someone whom i have learned to love more than anyone before. I am accepted for me and am supported in all of my decisions 100% for once in my life. She is wonderful to my kids and treats them as if her own. They love her dearly and are always so excited to see her. I couldn't ask for more. I have some wonderful friends that have stuck by my side through all the dark and crazy moments in my life. The sky is only getting more clear with each passing day. I am truly grateful to be where i am today. I have gotten over my anger with the church, as i was so involved in the past for the wrong reasons. I have been asked to teach again on Sundays. I have been thinking about returning a lot lately for myself and my own spirituality. I'm sure there will be more to come.